15 Comments
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jybyky's avatar

Water replaces oxygen, that's a very sharp sentence.

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L.G. Wells's avatar

This one stood out to me as well! Along with the opener: "Didn't you bother to ask?" Wow!

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Spencer D.W.'s avatar

Song paired with it isn't going under by evanescence. 0/10. your washed.

nah but seriously. this is very good. Great job homie.

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Bradley Ramsey's avatar

Haha, thanks for checking it out! I actually did consider doing that but it felt too obvious. I’m glad someone else thought of it though. 😂

This is why we’re friends. 🤝

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Spencer D.W.'s avatar

0/10 not enough evanescence. unplayable. hahahaha.

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Bradley Ramsey's avatar

I’m gonna retroactively add it and give you credit. 🤣

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Sean Nordquist's avatar

Love this... and I love the song, too.

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L.G. Wells's avatar

Mistake? The Elder Gods are NOT happy!

"I have looked upon all the universe has to hold of horror, and even the skies of spring and flowers of summer must ever afterward be poison to me." (I bet I don't need to credit this one) ;)

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Bradley Ramsey's avatar

Haha, no credit needed. I know Lovecraft when I see it. 👀🤓

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Novaheart's avatar

That is a really fun prompt. Drowning and Burning alive definitely not ideal. I am terrified of death itself so I plan to be immortal. I am hoping to become half cyborg or something. Think of how much writing I can do?

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L.G. Wells's avatar

Great job! And love the song (as always). Check out my response to this prompt for a little homage. ;)

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Kenna Cauldwell's avatar

Amazing work, I love how each line gets shorter and shorter like the time spent surfacing is lessening as the narrator slips into the water. Very immersive!!

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Suswati Basu's avatar

This is amazing. It feels so visceral!

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Mina Howell's avatar

Oh my gosh 😭

This is so tragic, but incredibly beautiful - and a very valid fear.

It has so many layers in such a short time, it's absolutely phenomenal!

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Chad R Herman's avatar

I love these poems!!!

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