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Edward.Marlo.Ruiz's avatar

A perfect blend of the unknown. Didn’t do the voice over for this one as that’s just my reading preference but your effort in these stories is so telling in itself. Worldbuilding is top notch and the ending is impactful. I was actually shocked to feel that he did it! At some point he’s doing this to himself. . . Maybe.

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Bradley Ramsey's avatar

All good! I'm so happy to hear that the story had an impact like this, even without the added audio elements. When I wrote this piece, I used as an exercise in worldbuilding. It is a test on how to show, not tell, so your feedback here is amazing to see!

Part two will be live later today, with the finale to follow tomorrow!

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Annieguile Bentulan's avatar

DAMN! What is in the vault!? This is bad—I have too many stories to follow, and now I have this one too! How am I supposed to divide my time!? I loved how you gave so much weight to Pavel's decision to pull the trigger; the hesitation was so pronounced in its inevitability. AND I SUPER LOVE THE VOICEOVER AND SOUNDEFFECTS!!!! Ooooh, I LOVED THIS!

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Bradley Ramsey's avatar

Thank you so much! I’ve been practicing with a program called Audacity and finally learned how to add music and sound effects.

Parts two and three will be out in the next couple days! Very excited to hear what you think. 😁

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Annieguile Bentulan's avatar

Looking forward to it! and oh Yes the Russian accent was 🔥

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Bradley Ramsey's avatar

Thank you! Been a while since I used that one, but it will feature heavily in part three. 👀

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Annieguile Bentulan's avatar

👀👀👀 Means more dialogue… this is a tease!! Alright2 okay2, IM HRE for it!

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Mina Howell's avatar

The sound effects, the story, the Russian accent - this is a solid 10000/10 and I can't wait for the other parts!

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Bradley Ramsey's avatar

Haha, I think that’s the highest score anyone’s ever given one of my stories! 🤯

Seriously though, thank you so much! If you enjoyed this opening, the second two parts are really going to wow you. Stay tuned!

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Mina Howell's avatar

Oh I will! 😁😁

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Stephanie Church's avatar

Bradley posts stuff all the time! Isn't he amazing?! I always get sucked into the story.

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Bradley Ramsey's avatar

Thank you so much, Stephanie! Comments like this always make my day. 😁

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Mar 9
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Bradley Ramsey's avatar

Haha, thank you so much! Barring any technical issues, part two should be out tomorrow! Part three will follow the day after. 😁

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